Theology and Apologetics Roundtable: Update on my mother

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Update on my mother

As many of already know, my mom passed two weeks ago on Sept. 13. She went peacefully. I got the call from my dad about noon time. The decision was made to remove the respirator that Monday morning and I didn't want to be there to see my mom take her last breath. Funeral services were the following Saturday in Columbia, SC and she was buried in her hometown McBee.

For many who didn't know her story, my mom and aunt are twins. My mom was born with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS). Her mother was an alcoholic and heavy smoker, even throughout her pregnancy. My mom was born underdeveloped and with deformities. Her joints were stiff. She had little mobility in her shoulders, elbows, and fingers. Her bones were very fragile. Most of all, both her kidneys were useless. At the age of seven, they began to slowly shrink. Doctors didn't think she would live passed her teens. My mom started dialysis 13 years ago. She was rushed to the ER a few weeks ago because she was having headaches so bad that she would pass out. I knew nothing about this until recently. When she got a CT scan. Doctors found bleeding in her brain and she need emergency brain surgery. The surgery went well. They stopped the bleeding. Soon after, she began having seizures every time she would awake. The seizure was apparently followed by a stroke. This was what really caused major damage to her. Her brain function was barely able to be read. The neurologist said he could put a number on it, it would about 10% brain function at the time. There was always hope for improvement over time. But unfortunately, my mom was slowly becoming a vegetable. There was no doubt that she was fighting...its just that her body wasn't listening. That weekend her body was rejecting the feeding tube and the dialysis treatment.

It was difficult to deal with the reality of what was to come but we knew it was time to give her comfort care and let time take its toll. In the beginning, I can't even count the days I spent fasting and praying and after the Lord the not to take her. Its hard to go through something like that when its a parent or even a child. You only got one mother. You can't replace that. Yet, through it all I can't even describe the peace that I had and the comfort that was soothing that I can only give God the credit for. My mom passed away at age 48. That would seem very young to many but for my mom's case that is a miracle to see her live that long. She never thought she would even live through her thirties. I know she is in heaven. She hated the pain and countless surgeries over the years but she was content with what God was doing in her life. She was never afraid of passing away. She was prepared.

I appreciate all the friends, family, LU and LBTS family who have reached out to me, sent words of encouragement, prayers, and have just simply been there for me.